Waiting and Falling in Love with “I Don’t Know”

Do you enjoy waiting? Truth be told, it’s probably tough to find someone who wakes up each morning thinking “I can’t wait to wait today!”

Then again, Heinz and Guinness both profess: “Good Things Come to Those Who Wait.”

Yesterday I had a bit of an “Ah HA!” moment around waiting after noticing such a vast difference in the scenery around my mountain top home after only 40 minutes time. Currently I live where the clouds begin their day, before the sun has its way. Being just a few miles from the Pacific Coast, the mornings here can often be quite overcast. At 8:20am it was foggy and gloomy, but by 9am the sun was a beaming ball of brightness in a bright blue cloudless sky. I had never paid attention to the timing of the transition and was shocked at how quickly the scenery changed!

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There was such a deep message in this vastly different view of the sky that happened in a matter of minutes. To put it very simply: All we have to do is wait…

If I hadn’t known that the sun was working its magic up above the clouds, I may have looked outside and wondered if it would rain. Instead, I went on about my day and: Poof! Seemingly instantly everything was different. Even if it had stayed overcast, rest assured the sun is always shining even on the dreariest of days! Anyone that has ever flown in a plane knows this: up above the clouds it’s always bright, sunny and blue. We can’t control the clouds and even the best weather forcaster can’t predict exactly what is going to happen. Although, if we wait the weather will always change.

How does this relate to life?

What do you normally do when a seemingly unfortunate situation pops up? So often we get stuck in the thinking of “This is just how it is” or “I’ll be stuck here for a while.” Or, frequently the go-getters of the world think “If it’s to be, it’s up to me… how can I change this problem?” We then try to think our work our way out.

Change is a certain thing and we are the ones putting labels on whether a situation is “good” or “bad.” There is a loveliness in the art of waiting while knowing everything is beautifully designed and working exactly as it ought to be. Another piece of the puzzle is realizing the situation you are in is never good or bad, it just is. You are actually operating perfectly in the midst of a perfect experience and it’s only a misunderstanding that is creating what looks like a situation. The situation is not a result of not knowing what to do or doing something wrong. There is nothing to fix, only a clearer understanding to grasp.

For example, only a few days ago a friend reached out wanting help with figuring out where to go. He wants something new, but has no idea what/where that is. Not knowing the answer seemed like a situation to figure out. The great news is there is no situation at all! Here is part of my reply: “Consider how great it is that you don’t know. This has been one of the best parts of the amazingness of my journey: living in the not knowing and learning to love living in the ‘I don’t know.’ Loving not knowing changes everything… let’s live in the ‘I don’t know’ because we don’t and isn’t that awesome?”

Loving living in the “I don’t know” is equivalent to loving living in the presence of unlimited possibilities. The secret is: There will be a moment when you do know… there is a feeling that comes with knowing. This is the secret to “Coddiwompling.” Coddiwompling is purely living by instinct. I do this in everything and it is so simple, fun and fruitful.

The most common question I get on my grand adventure is “Where are you off to next?”

Almost always the answer is: “I don’t know.” Reason being: If I knew where my next stop is, I’d probably already be there. So, I wait: I enjoy my present surroundings and love living in the “not knowing.” The most incredible moment is the instant I know. There is a feeling that suddenly arises. It’s like opening a special gift!

Feelings are like our internal compass. We always have a full 360 degrees of possibilities. When we try to figure it out or think we know where we should go we limit ourselves to just a small slice of the compass rose. When we are completely open and instinctively operate, anything is possible.

Now, it is important to note, I don’t sit around and eat bon bons on the couch waiting for the next step to appear. I let life live me. If it feels right, I’ll ask around for ideas, maybe explore the possibilities, but never be dead set on figuring it out. There is a lightness to the exploration and a knowing that I’ll know soon enough and it will be perfect. It’s simple. The best part is we can do this in every part of life: relationships, business, career, hobbies, family, travel, and everything.  The key is knowing we don’t have to know all the individual steps that will need to happen. We only have to take the next step, then be open for the next step to reveal itself, and repeat. As an added bonus this also erases all stress and worry.

Are there times when we all get caught up in the frustration of not knowing? Of course! Met too!! The way I see it, the seemingly icky feelings in those moments are like a fire alarm for life: Those feeling are internal signals that we are off track. The moment I notice I’m getting all caught up it’s like the fire alarm going off alerting me that I left toast in the toaster. “Ooops! Oh well, I got off track. Thanks for the reminder!” Then it’s just a matter of realizing we can gently slip back into the waiting.

“Waiting” is not necessarily an idle time, although it can be if that feels right. “Waiting” is living life fully alive while knowing everything will work out perfectly. This primes us for truly living and enjoying the heck out of life. How simple and fun, right?

Give it a go: fall in love with the not knowing. When you don’t know, wait. Instead of trying to figure it out with your intellect, let your heart (AKA gut feeling or instinct) lead the way. Live, enjoy, and be open. See what brilliance pops up and go with it. Then repeat. This is the art of Coddiwompling… there is no better way to live.

Heinz and Guinness had it wrong. Amazingly awesome things come to those who wait!

 

Until the next revolution….

 

 

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